I woke up and wiggled my foot, like I’ve taken to doing these past few days, to see if I can feel any evidence of pain. I did. I think I went back to sleep. How am I so tired?
When I finally got up, I could hear the choral music from the nearby sanctuary of Fatima. Today is June 13th, a special day in Fatima history. Fatima is probably most notable for being the site where Mary mother of Jesus appeared to three shepherd children 6 times from May to October on the 13th of every month. 13 junho is the celebration of this second appearance. People travel from all over the world for this celebration and I guess I’m one of them.
I made my way over a bit early thinking I’d find a cafe for coffee first but I didn’t. It was cold and people were getting their seats. At some point the priest was clearly trying to get everyone to sing along and sing louder, to little avail. People were milling about, taking pictures, chatting in their groups, not really engaging fully. That was actually disappointing to me. I wished I knew the words to join him.
I decided to go get the coffee then circle back. On my way I passed one of the easily hundreds of souvenir shops and decided to grab a scarf for my hair & a postcard. I got my coffee & pastry (almond tart this time, just eh) and took it to my room to put away the souvenirs.
Somehow I ended up asleep again.
I woke up to the sound of drums and thought maybe there was a parade happening so I headed back to the sanctuary. I never actually deciphered the drum sound but the area was now filled with people participating in what seemed like a large outdoor mass.
I sat, listened and prayed, as the mass was mostly in Portuguese. I watched and prayed as people sat and kneeled and stood and recited. I felt this overwhelming desire for us all to experience Yahweh more. I also noticed the age of the crowd, many of them at least my age, most of them much older, very few children in the crowd. I wondered how a celebration of Mary appearing to children didn’t garner more of a youth audience. I celebrated and prayed for the children that were present.
I feel this tension sometimes of not being catholic in these catholic settings. I think on one hand I honor the traditions as a vehicle to relationship even if the religious aspect doesn’t appeal to me. On the other hand, I feel like the vehicle don’t be moving. I’m hungry for union, not just for me but for the body.
Everyone begins taking out white flags and waving them some procession begins. After it’s over, I walked past some sisters and I thought to ask them to pray for my foot. So I did. One replied, “we will pray.” I said thank you. So that happened. Another lady asked me if I wanted a picture in front of the sanctuary. I said yes. So that happened.
Afterward many of the shops were filled with people so I went back to my room to rest my foot more until the crowds passed. I decided to have a big lunch with leftovers and spend the rest of the day resting. I went with a lamb stew with potatoes which was delicious. The waitress asked if I was finished but then gave me more time to really clean my plate. I did.
I chilled the rest of the day. Iced and elevated my feet. All the good stuff. Then I slept.
A couple of reflections to share:
one) when I was in the midst of the frustration it was easy to focus on reality and not truth. Truth is, I was never alone, and always protected.
b.) I came to Fatima in part because I found a cross that said Fatima when I was walking my first Camino, sometime near my birthday. A pilgrim I was walking with, Kasia, told me about the place and the pilgrimage. I mentally cataloged it and thought maybe eventually I’ll check it out. Today is eventually.
yellow) Fatima and Santiago are both characters in a book called The Alchemist, I read with my class this year. I really enjoy and recommend this book. I get really excited about the conversations I’ll get to have with the kiddos about these adventures.
echo) speaking of recommendations, two podcasts and two albums I really enjoy and have been listening to when I can. The Homestead - Aubrey and Damon Thompson Ministries. Hymns & Disparity by Tekoa and Soul Hymns by Mark Barlow.
Lastly, since I’m time traveling I’d like to acknowledge that the present day is Father’s Day. Shoutout to the dads! The only who I actually know reads this is Marcus so I gifted him the wonderfully bulleted list and this picture of a yellow arrow in Fatima.
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